If there hadn’t been women we’d still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends. – Orson Welles
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Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon. – Tim Allen
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You can’t keep changing men, so you settle for changing your lipstick. – Heather Locklear
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I don’t have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who’d be mad at me for saying that. – Mitch Hedberg
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Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow. – William Shakespeare
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